Golf and the Priest
A
man goes to the confessional and begins "Forgive me Father, for I have
sinned.
"What
is your sin, my son?" the priest asks back.
"Well,"
the man starts, "I used some horrible language this week and I feel
absolutely terrible."
"When
did you use this awful language?" asks the priest.
"I
was golfing and hit an incredible drive that looked like it was going to go over
250 yards, but it struck a phone line that was hanging over the fairway and fell
straight down to the ground after going only about 100 yards."
"Is
that when you swore?"
"No,
Father," says the man. "After that, a squirrel ran out of the bushes
and grabbed my ball in his mouth and began to run away."
"Is
THAT when you swore?" asks the Father again.
"Well,
no," says the man. "You see, as the squirrel was running, an eagle
came down out of the sky, grabbed the squirrel in his talons and began to fly
away!"
"Is
THAT when you swore?" asks the amazed Priest.
"No,
not yet," the man replies. "As
the eagle carried the squirrel away in his claws, it flew toward the green.
And as it passed over a bit of forest near the green, the squirrel
dropped my ball."
"Did
you swear THEN?" asks the now impatient Priest.
"No,
because as the ball fell it struck a tree, bounced through some bushes, careened
off a big rock, and rolled through a sand trap onto the green and stopped within
six inches of the hole."
The
Priest sighs, "You missed the fucking putt, didn't you?"
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